Nargis was all of 16 when she met Raj Kapoor, a 22-year-old budding filmmaker who was still trying to put together the first film of his newly built RK Studios. As is well documented, they fell in love, even though Raj was married to Krishna Raj Kapoor. Their relationship existed in their utopian world but the bubble burst when Nargis realised that this relationship was a lost cause. For a star of her stature, she found that her opportunities were starting to decrease dramatically in the mid-1950s, and even at RK Studios, she wasn’t getting the kind of work that had first gotten her recognition.
Other banners often looked to Raj, as if to seek his permission, before casting Nargis. She had also come to the difficult realisation that Raj was never going to leave his wife, and while this broke her heart, she had snapped out of the lovesick state that she had been locked in for almost a decade. This was right around the time when Mehboob Khan offered her Mother India, a role that carved her name in Hindi cinema’s history, and it was on this set that she met the love of her life, her future husband, Sunil Dutt.
Threat of Raj Kapoor drove Sunil Dutt-Nargis to keep their relationship a secret
In the film, Sunil was playing Nargis’ son and the two, along with Rajendra Kumar, would hang out together. When a fire broke out on the set of the film, Sunil rescued Nargis and in the days that followed, Nargis fell in love with him. Sunil’s burns were much worse than hers and she sat by his bedside for days to look after him. The kind exchanges between the two made her understand the true meaning of love and within a fortnight, they knew that they wanted to get married.
Within a fortnight, Sunil Dutt and Nargis knew they had to be married. (Photo: Express Archives)
Raj’s bruised ego and the shock that Nargis had cut ties with him were a lot to bear for him. He, too, had been madly in love with her and could not understand what led to her sudden decision. Raj was an influential figure in Bollywood at the time, while Sunil was just a newcomer. With the power play involved in the film industry, which was just as ugly back then, Sunil and Nargis did not want to risk anything.
Despite living in the same city, they decided to write letters to each other so no one could spot them together. Nargis was scared of her brother Akhtar Hussain, who had been physically violent with her because of her alliance with Raj. Sunil and Nargis also didn’t want to jeopardise his career, as they were playing mother-son in Mother India, and any news about their romantic relationship could harm the film even before its release. Many of those letters, and some parts of Nargis’ journals, are documented in Kishwar Desai’s book Darlingji: The True Love Story Of Nargis & Sunil Dutt.
‘Relationship with Raj Kapoor was a horrible nightmare’
Sunil, in later years of his life, revealed that in these letters, they addressed each other as ‘Pia’ and ‘Hey There’, or sometimes as ‘Marilyn Monroe’ and ‘Elvis Presley’. Nargis felt that she could be completely honest with Sunil, even with regard to her failed relationship with Raj. Sunil had created such a safe space for her that she comfortable to open up about her fears. She confessed to him that her relationship with Raj was on “razor’s edge” towards the end and she could feel herself “desperately” trying to hold on to it. Describing it as a “horrible nightmare”, Nargis said that she was “in hell.” She felt like her love was a “beautiful plant which wanted to bloom but could not because there was poison in the soil” and told him that Raj “had started making me feel disgusting even to myself.”
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After meeting Sunil, Nargis felt she could finally breathe again. Here was a man who was honest and dependable, and even though he was yet to become a successful movie star, it did not matter to her. In one of her letters, she told Sunil that she had found love after “so many years of misery.” She had convinced herself that she was in love in the past, but had just realised that it was “just lust and passions from the other side, and I satisfied it at the cost of my life.”
Sunil was well aware that Nargis was a star, and he was yet to become someone noteworthy. During this phase, he was constantly in awe of her and often wondered how a superstar of her stature was so simple. When Sunil’s sister suffered from tuberculosis, Nargis put her life on hold and took care of her. “I knew she was the one I wanted to be with. She could be with my family. They had been through a lot and she could put a smile on their face,” he shared in the 1991 documentary named Nargis.
Nargis and Sunil Dutt got married in 1958. (Photo: Express Archives)
Nargis was surrounded by ‘Raj’s men’ in Moscow, he sent her telegrams
Sunil and Nargis had found each other but many around her were constantly sowing seeds of doubt in her head. Director Mehboob Khan felt that Sunil was using her to get ahead in his career, but Nargis paid no attention to his remarks. After her mother Jaddanbai’s passing, Nargis had become the sole earner of the household, where she had to take care of her brothers and their children. In one of her letters, she told Sunil that she was “being forced to work because I need the money. My heart is not in my work anymore. I feel quite fed up… I want to go away from India so badly, but I find no way.”
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When Nargis broke up with Raj, gossipmongers in the industry started badmouthing her. When one such story reached Sunil, she told him that they would say anything to malign her image. She described Raj as a “bad dream” and said she was “not concerned with him anymore.”
Even though Nargis did not wish to work anymore, she had to continue for she wanted to protect the future of her nephews and nieces. During this time, she went to Moscow to shoot for director KA Abbas’ Pardesi, an Indo-USSR collaboration which starred her with the Soviet actor Oleg Strizhenov. She and Sunil had been together only for a few months and were writing to each other every day. Raj, who was yet to come to terms with this break-up, was still sending her telegrams, trying to claw his way back into her life. While in Russia, the memories of the time she spent with Raj rushed back, but Nargis stood her ground. “All of them were asking about Raj. I am so fed up with answering them,” she wrote to Sunil.
Nargis and Raj Kapoor had previously travelled to USSR on numerous ocassions. (Photo: Express Archives)
She had found stable support in Sunil but while in Moscow, he felt that she was surrounded by “Raj’s men”. Art director Madhu Achrelkar pushed her to work with Raj again and said that they were “destined” to work together. Director KA Abbas also pushed her to work with Raj again, but she ignored his suggestions. Meanwhile, Raj would constantly check with the crew and enquire about Nargis’ whereabouts. Sunil was naturally worried as Nargis told him that her work was being delayed, and he had heard rumours that Raj was on his way to Russia, just so he could meet her. “My love, my only worry is that you are alone,” he told her.
Raj Kapoor drops in on Nargis, unannounced
Sometimes, their letters to each other wouldn’t reach on time, and Sunil would start panicking. To reassure him, Nargis told him that after her parents died, she “trusted Raj” but he “after exploiting me, did not bother about me.” Nargis reaffirmed to Sunil that Raj was history for her, but it was then that Raj left her shocked with an unannounced visit in Germany.
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Nargis was on her way back to India from the USSR when she had to make a stop in Berlin. Nargis had the “most unexpected” encounter with Raj at the airport, and was told that he was there to attend a film festival.
Raj Kapoor dropped in on Nargis while she was in Berlin. (Photo: Express Archives)
Raj, she said, “behaved like a perfect gentleman” as they spent an afternoon together, followed by dinner. “He said that he knew I am no more for him and that there is no going back for me. The only urge that he wanted to satisfy was to know what is the cause of the separation,” she wrote. Nargis was “frank” with Raj, the way she had never been before. “We were like friends or associates, like co-workers and nothing beyond that,” she said and felt that this meeting took a “big load off her chest.” “Everything was said gracefully, no emotional upsets,” she wrote.
Nargis had not seen Raj ever since she broke things off with him five months ago and was naturally feeling a “little nervous” when she first saw him. To Raj, this was also a strange meeting as he was yet to come to terms with the break-up. “This parting will be good not only for me alone but good for him good for his wife and very good for his children,” she felt.
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Raj Kapoor offered her money, land, movies
Nargis had to stay in Berlin until she could get a flight to Mumbai and the next day, she wrote to Sunil, “It may have looked strange to Raj, but I was not intimate with him at all.” Just six months ago, Nargis and Raj had been to Germany but things between them had changed now.
The next day, Nargis took a flight out of Berlin and Raj, with tears in his eyes, came to see her off at the airport. He told her of the many stories that he wanted to make movies out of, and wondered who would work in them. Nargis flatly refused. He also offered her the dues that he owed her and even though Nargis needed that money, she refused to get entangled with him and rejected the money. He asked what he should do with the plot of land he had bought for them to build a house together, she rejected that as well. Whatever he could offer, he did, but Nargis did not want to get involved with him again.
After nine years of togetherness, Nargis called quits on their relationship. (Photo: Express Archives)
As Nargis walked towards her flight, Raj waved her goodbye and kept waving at her until she was in sight. “I am sure he must be feeling bad. I myself was feeling slightly disturbed,” she told Sunil, but for her, the Raj chapter was over now. She felt that she had gotten her closure and believed that Raj, too, had gotten his chance to say his peace.
Raj Kapoor saw it as a ‘great betrayal’
The next year, Nargis and Sunil got married, and Raj saw it as a “great betrayal”. As per Madhu Jain’s book, The Kapoors: The First Family of Indian Cinema, Raj believed that Nargis had betrayed him by marrying Sunil. As per the book, Raj “would reportedly burn himself with cigarette butts to check if he was not dreaming, wondering how she could have done this to him.” Krishna, his wife, told journalist Bunny Reuben that he would come home drunk every night and weep for hours in the bathtub.
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Nargis and Sunil Dutt stayed married until her death in 1981. She never looked back at Raj, who went on to have other affairs despite being married.
